SRU didn't lose...but they sure tried

The PSAC weekend was extremely exciting and such. Except not. Slippery Rock tried their best to lose but Millersville wouldn't let them.

Slippery Rock (Hey, at least no one got arrested DURING the game) 21, Millersville (Hey, we brought 20 people disguised as fans) 15

So anyways, during the mass amounts of arrests during homecoming weekend, Slippery Rock bounded out to a 21-2 lead until special teams decided to take a coffee break and the punter decided he didn't need to catch the ball anymore. (To his defense, one-hoppers to the punters aren't exactly easy) So anyways, Millersville scores 2 touchdowns only to have their pathetic offense stall again. Slippery Rock now goes to Edinboro to get stomped most likely.

Edinboro (When does the snow come, we want to build snowmen and dive down the hill) 20, IUP (No more bar fights on the road) 10

So Edinboro won again defeating the hated IUP Indians or Native Americans or guys with red Coors Light bottles on the back of their bus. Edinboro apparently froze out those IUPers with snow, ice and that nasty moo-shu flu.

California (Out of the black hole) 41, Shippensburg (We're not just the Raiders, we're the Red Raiders) 13

California wins again over Shippensburg in a game that is bound to make the Central Pennsylvania folks cry. The Vulcans are one of the teams that actually has a winning record.

Clarion (Those tricky Golden Eagles) 16 Lock Haven (Those tricky Bald Eagles) 0

In this game of eagles the golden one shaved the bald ones clean. It was swell.

I have to put this is purely for comedic "genius." The PSAC really is that bad of a league this year in the annals of Division II football. Slippery Rock won though and IUP lost. That makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.